Kevin Smith Rocks Out with His Cop Out


Source: Edward Douglas

After writing and directing eight raunchy, irreverent and mostly independent comedies in his relatively short 15 year career, Kevin Smith certainly made a name for himself for a certain type of movie, building himself an incredibly devout fanbase from it, too. Who knows what was going through his mind when a script titled “A Couple of Dicks” crossed his path? Maybe as he reached his 40th birthday, he was looking for a much-needed change?

The story goes that writers Mark and Robb Cullen were the showrunners on a pilot Smith directed and when they sold their script for the movie to Warner Bros., Smith’s name was thrown into the ring as a possible director. The results are Cop Out, an ’80s throwback buddy cop comedy that brings together Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan in a good cop/bad cop–that’s “bad” as in dumb and incompetent–scenario. It’s the first movie Smith has directed from someone else’s script, his first attempt at a genre widely regarded as the type that Hollywood often churns out, and it also trades Smith’s long-standing association with one set of brotherly distributors (the Weinsteins) for another (the Warners).

Kevin Smith is easily one of the most outspoken filmmakers out there, but let’s face it, the guy can ramble if given the chance, so being that we couldn’t get the type of opportunity that allows us to steer the interview into any sort of coherent direction, instead sitting in two back-to-back roundtable interviews, we’re calling this one “Kevin Smith’s Best Bits About the Making of ‘Cop Out.’”

Why Direct Someone Else’s Script?

“For me, it just happened at the right time. I’d come off ‘Zack and Miri’ which I loved so dearly with my heart, but it didn’t wind up doing much more than the standard Kevin Smith business, and that movie was supposed to be the one that punched us all through to the next level. Suddenly, that type of storytelling had become very profitable, telling stories about dudes that were in love with one another, who don’t f*ck yet. So suddenly, I was making one with the guy from the other one that was insanely successful, so I’m making mine with the ‘Knocked Up’ guy and everybody thought it would do $60-70 (million) but it wound up doing ‘Kevin Smith business.’ At that point, I was like, ‘Okay, I’m done, I give up, I can’t stand it anymore.’ If I were to write at that point in my life, which I often do, I would have been writing a script about this poor fat kid whose movie didn’t make enough money. Nobody wants to see that f*cking movie, least of all me. At that point, I’m like, ‘I just won’t say anything for a while.’ Into my life comes the script for ‘A Couple of Dicks’ that the Cullen brothers had sent to me because I worked with them on this pilot called ‘Man-Child’ for Showtime, so I’d seen the script and saw their name on it, but I didn’t know why they’d send it to me. Then I got an Email from Jeff Robinov, the guy who runs Warner Bros., and he said, ‘Hey, what do you think about A Couple of Dicks?’ And I said, ‘I can answer that question a number of ways.’ He wanted me to read it and I read it and I said, ‘This is funny, dude, do you want me to rewrite it? There’s not much I can do ’cause this sh*t is funny. I can take your money to rewrite but I’d only add a couple of jokes.’ He said ‘Not rewrite.’ ‘You want me to cameo? You want me to be that Dave guy, ’cause that part’s funny. I can see a fat guy doing parkour.’ He goes, ‘I find it very odd that it takes you three guesses why I sent you, a filmmaker, a script. That’s just really funny. Three guesses. I’m surprised you didn’t ask me if I wanted you to do craft services.’”

Brooklyn, Queens, Etc…

“I had no idea there was more than one borough in the city. I grew up in Jersey and whenever we said ‘The city,’ it was Manhattan, so this script was written for Los Angeles, and when we talked about coming over here to do it in New York, they did a rewrite and most of it was still set on the island. So when we got here, we were based out of Kaufman Astoria in Queens and I was like ‘Where is Queens?’ and they said, ‘It’s where Spider-Man lives.’ Once we were there, I spent more time there than I ever spent before. I was discovering Queens and then they introduced me to Brooklyn, but I’d heard about but always thought it was a fictional place from a storybook. Suddenly, you meet these two completely other boroughs that is kind of like the real New York in a weird way. I was meeting people in the boroughs who was like ‘I’ve never been to Manhattan, what’s it like?’ I was like, ‘You are SH*TTING me!’ and they’re like, ‘Have you ever been to Brooklyn before?’ No, good point.”

Letting Tracy Morgan Run Wild

“It never hurts to always unleash, because you can always rein it in in the editing room, so while we were on the set, I think for the first week, Bruce was like, ‘Why aren’t we cutting yet?’ because we would just keep rolling. The scene proper would be done but I’d still be rolling, because I knew Tracy would be like, ‘Okay, now the scene’s about to begin.’ It took a while for everybody to catch on that we’re just going to go and see what happens, and I’ll just call out sh*t like ‘Say this, say this!’ Having Bruce there absolutely helped because Bruce would be a true governor where he would be like, ‘This is not funny. Why are we talking about this?’ so we were like, ‘Okay, if Bruce doesn’t think it’s funny, let’s rein it in.’”

An Audience of One… Named “Bruce Willis”

“All of us were stepping up our A game just to make this one f*cking dude laugh and I think that is part of the reason why that scene is so funny. He didn’t figure it out until the very end. I think Bruce felt, ‘Ah, we’re all making a movie,’ but he’s got 25 years. He’s got longevity in a business that doesn’t have longevity anymore. When I was a kid and I walked into a video store or movie theater, they’d have a picture of Humphrey Bogart, Cary Grant, sh*t like that, to represent movies. He’s that face. He represents movies now. You go into a video store or a movie theatre and they have murals? There’s John McLane or any number of things he’s been in. He’s like a living legend and sh*t and I was intimidated ’cause I’d never worked with a movie star before. Please don’t tell Ben Affleck I said that.”

Working in the Studio System

“I give credit to Jeff Robinov. This is the nearest thing that I can figure out now that I’ve been inside. This guy seems to be making all these weird decisions and moves that are good. Basically he takes interesting filmmakers and puts them into studio movies, so you’ve got Guy Ritchie shooting ‘Sherlock Holmes,’ you’ve got Christopher Nolan shooting f*cking ‘Dark Knight,’ you got me shooting ‘Cop Out.’ There was some other f*cker they did. I like what they do here, but I make movies that need a needle to be thread and they make chainsaws at Warner Bros. Their thing is that ‘We like how they thread a needle but let’s see if they can make a chainsaw.’ You got cats doing stuff you wouldn’t normally associate them with and I like that, that’s ballsy, that’s trying for something. Soderbergh laid the ground. He went into Warner Bros. first and said, ‘I’m going to make ‘Ocean’s 11,’ I’m the guy who made Schizopolis.” You can’t make two different f*cking movies than that! But he did and he was successful.”

Studios Do Have Their Benefits

“The best example of having them behind you is three weeks I was up in Toronto and we were four weeks out from my release right now and there was more awareness for my movie this far our than there was for ‘Zack and Miri’ 12 seconds ago, that’s the difference. When we had the title hiccup, when there was the moment where we had to change from ‘A Couple of Dicks’ to ‘Cop Out,’ their whole thing was, ‘We can’t market the movie effectively if we can’t run ads before 9pm.’ That was the problem. If we can’t do that, we can’t market the movie effectively. I was like, ‘What are you talking about? It’s an R-rated movie, we’re going after people who watch TV after 9 anyway!’ Their marketing is like the Bombing of Dresden, they just take it out and they make a huge impact. You cannot turn around without being aware of that movie and what it’s kind of about and when it’s opening, that’s how they market. So the idea of them not being able to advertise before 9pm terrified them. Once we agreed to change it and they started their marketing campaign a month later, you could see why they were nervous. You can’t do what they’re doing with this movie if you’re hamstrung by a time. They’ve owned the Olympics for the last week. Every time I’ve watched an Olympic event, it’s like ‘Sponsored by Cop Out’ and I’m like ‘WHAT? I made that movie!!!’ Because for fifteen years in the world I come from, I was so involved in the marketing and publicity and they always tell you where it is and what you need to do to make it better, I was used to that, and these cats are like, ‘You did your job, you made the movie, thank you, we got this from here.’ All of a sudden, you’ll be walking somewhere and there’ll be a billboard up and you’ll be like, ‘How did that happen?’”

The Retro Music

“Ironically, we were shooting the movie and I would always say to Robb and Mark Cullen, ‘Am I crazy man? I just want Harold Faltermeyer to score the movie.’ The vibe I was going for when I was shooting was ‘Fletch,’ and I was temping the movie with ‘Fletch’ cues and sh*t. At the same time, Faltermeyer apparently went into Warner Bros. and was just like, ‘Hey, man, I feel like scoring again, what do you guys have?’ ‘Well, we’re not sure, but we’ll get back to you when we figure something out.’ Then all of a sudden, I was calling someone at Warner Bros. going, ‘Hey, would you guys fight me on Harold Faltermeyer?’ So they put us together and I loved him so much. He watched our temp cut which had all of his music in it from ‘Fletch,’ ‘Tango & Cash,’ ‘Beverly Hills Cop,’ so he was just f*cking flattered. He was sitting there watching the movie where he was the third character the whole time, so when he came back to do the original score–as opposed to all the cues of his we stole before–he just did a great job. I loved every time I would get an Email from Harold Faltmeyer and there would be a cue in it. Pull it down, put it in my iTunes and listen to it and the first time I heard the theme song, the main cue? I just wanted to go back in time and tell 15-year-old me, ‘You’re going to have a Harold Faltermeyer theme song in your movie!’”

Before we wrapped up, Smith also talked about editing the movie himself and how important that is to his creative process even for a movie he didn’t write and how hard it was for him to accept the fact that the studio wanted another editor to come in after Smith to do a pass on it. Like with Faltermeyer, Smith threw out a name of an editor he liked and trusted, that being Stephen Mirrione, the Oscar winning editor of Steven Soderbergh’s Traffic, and Warner Bros. indeed got Mirrione to look the movie over, but he only made a couple of changes.

All of the above culminates with the release of Cop Out nationwide on February 26.

@Billygator “Saw #CopOut last night. Wonderful movie! Full theatre really responded well.” Right on! I was at the premiere last night. It played like crazy there, too. So fun to laugh at something with a crowd that I’ve been giggling at by myself for months now.

Don’t worry, folks – Many of you will get to enjoy this one in just 3 short days! Until then, Collider.com has got SEVEN clips from the film neatly strung together in one easy to watch video (they’ll play one after another). Enjoy six and a half segmented (though unfortunately censored) minutes from “Cop Out”.

So far, here’s what we’re seeing as far as scheduled “Cop Out” press on the tube this week:

Wednesday 2/24 – Tracy Morgan is on The Daily Show (Comedy Central).

Thursday 2/25 – Adult Swim (Cartoon Network) airs a Sneak Peak of “Cop Out”. Seann William Scott tapes Chelsea Lately and appears on Craig Ferguson (CBS late night). Bruce Willis appears on Regis & Kelly.

Friday 2/25 – For “Cop Out” Opening Day, Seann William Scott appears on Bonnie Hunt.

We’re expecting more press to roll in, so once we know, so will you. “Cop Out” takes over North American theaters this Friday, February 26th. Spread the word.

Smith ready for U.S.-Canada, then it’s ‘Hit Somebody’

By Adam Kimelman – NHL.com Staff Writer

Acclaimed filmmaker Kevin Smith spent Sunday doing interviews for his new movie, “Cop Out,” which comes out Feb. 26. But there really was only one thing on his mind.

U.S. vs. Canada.

“I called my kid (daughter Harley), she’s sleeping in a different hotel room from me this morning,” Smith said. “I got up very early and I said, ‘You know what happens tonight?’ And she said, ‘Parise vs. Brodeur,’ and I said ‘Yes!’ It’s a big game for us.”

Smith, New Jersey to the core despite his current Los Angeles address, still bleeds Devils red. So for him, it’s a win-win situation knowing either Canada goalie Martin Brodeur or U.S. forwards Zach Parise and Jamie Langenbrunner are going to leave Canada Hockey Place happy.

“That’s a big bucket of win for me,” said Smith. “I’m not sitting there going (go) Team USA, and I’m certainly not sitting there going (go) Team Canada. I’m just like, that’s the best hockey you’ll ever see. Unlike an all-star game, these guys are going for medals. They’re going to play really hard.”

So hard, in fact, he hopes for some NHL-like extracurricular activity.

“I’m hoping they’re so competitive Marty starts busting out like (Ron) Hextall and starts slashing ankles,” Smith said. “It would be awesome to see a Marty-Parise fight.”

While that likely won’t happen — at least outside of Lou Lamoriello’s nightmares — expect to see that kind of action in Smith’s next project, the hockey-themed “Hit Somebody.”

Smith revealed exclusively to NHL.com that Seann William Scott, who worked with Smith on “Cop Out,” will play Buddy, the title character in “Hit Somebody.” The script, based on a Warren Zevon song with lyrics by acclaimed writer Mitch Albom, is a story of a hockey enforcer who strives to score just one goal in a hockey game.

“Seann, for me, was the key into the character,” Smith told NHL.com. “I had all the elements in place, and the one thing I was missing was the personality. Generally I like to write to a voice, but I didn’t know who that voice was or what that voice could be. And then after spending all the time with Seann on this movie, he’s pitch perfect. He is that guy.

“This dude has something in him that you can just see hangs so well on Buddy. He’s got some pain that’s going to work out well. More importantly he has so much love in his heart. Seann Scott is such an ebullient, happy person who’s just happy to be there. And on (“Cop Out”) you could see it. On our set the guy is just so delighted to be working, to be making people laugh. But he’s always dismissed as Stifler. … This is his chance to shine.”

Scott, a native of Cottage Grove, Minn., admittedly isn’t much of a skater, but for the role of Buddy, that works just fine.

“I didn’t grow up playing hockey which is good because the character is not supposed to be a great player, he’s a great fighter,” Scott said.

“When I pegged Seann, I said ‘You’re Minnesota; that might as well be Canada,” said Smith. “You’re from hockey country. He was like, I’m an athlete and I played a lot of baseball and basketball, but I wasn’t good at hockey. I can skate, though. I said that’s all I need. He doesn’t have to be Paul Coffey on skates. He shouldn’t be.”

Scott said spending time with Smith drew him back into hockey — he follows the Minnesota Wild, but not closely — and Smith said he’s hoping Scott will join him in June at the Walter Gretzky Street Hockey Tournament in Brantford, Ont., that Smith has turned into a personal pilgrimage. Besides his playing goalie for his own team, Puck U., Smith will be bringing seven teams along with him.

The tournament also allows him to indulge his personal obsession with all things Gretzky, and have a life outside the movies. It’s why he enlists close friends and family members for his own team, rather than friends like Seth Rogen and Ben Affleck.

“These cats are super-famous and they got other things to do, they got lives,” said Smith. “The notion that you want to go to suburban Ontario to play street hockey while Wayne Gretzky’s dad watches — some people don’t want to do it. Seann William Scott will definitely go. He wasn’t aware of it last time. I remember saying while we were making the movie that I was going to play hockey, and he was like, where? Maybe he’ll come.”

While nothing is locked in contractually, Smith said having Scott’s voice in his head makes finishing the script a far easier task.

“Once I get going I could probably write it in less than a month, because it’s all right here at the top of my throat, ready to go, and in my heart,” Smith said. “In my heart of hearts I know it’s Seann, it’s so easy to go. Just easy to skate all-out when you have a voice in your head and I have his voice well in my head.”

That voice doesn’t sound like Scott’s famed “Stifler” character from the “American Pie” franchise. Scott has done dramatic roles before, and Smith believes Hit Somebody can elevate both their careers.

“I look at this as Seann’s opportunity to go to the (Tom) Hanks level,” Smith said. “Hanks for years and years did this (lesser) role and then he became that (blockbuster movie) guy. This is Seann’s chance to do that as well, not just be Stifler. And it’s my chance to not just be the “Clerks” guy. It’s my chance to do something big, epic in scale. Stories I tell span one day. … This spans 30 years. You’re talking a period. You’re trying to bring people to a time in your life that hasn’t existed in 30 years. The look of it, the feel of it, the sound of it — everything I have is going to be in that movie.”

Okay, so all that said, let’s catch up. The most detailed version of Kevin’s story was now told via a video blog which you can find HERE. We apologize for all the chunks, but Kevin did this on the fly using software that made that the fastest way to get the clips up. Kevin was invited on many national talk shows to discuss this (Larry King Live, Good Morning America, etc) but decided this was the best way to tell the story in full, without censorship. So there it is.

In addition to that, Kevin presented SModcast #107, where passenger Natali, also wronged by SWA, gets to tell her side of the story. Keep in mind, this happened all in the same weekend. Just makes you wonder how long it’s been going on, without folks having their voices heard. “Thinicism” is the title, and it’s streaming or downloadable for free right now, exclusively at www.smodcast.com.

Finally today, Kevin’s latest blog entry really shows how the airline has changed their story, with visual evidence, a good example of a very poorly-handled bit of publicity and customer service. This entry focuses on the media, and the careless way they have handled this event as well, basically rewriting it to make a story, not paying attention to the actual facts (which Kevin has made READILY available all week long, they didn’t even need to work to find them). You’ll want to hit up Silent Bob Speaks for the entire story, but here are a few highlights:

…Yes, I have a job that pays me handsomely, and because of this, I normally do fly on airlines for which size is never an issue. And as I’ve said repeatedly: I’ve been flying Southwest from Burbank to Oakland, SF, and Vegas for years (yes, even the FATTER years), and I’ve never had a problem (beyond the occasional disappointment in lapse of customer service that we’re all so used to, it can no longer be considered a true “problem” when traveling). But then, we really fell off a cliff.

…

Everyone keeps saying “Sue! Sue!” Jesus – I don’t want their money; I just want them to admit they fucked up, and they’re sorry to me, Natali, and anybody else they gave shit for no reason. And I Tweeted about it. Lots. And rather than simply handle it, they lied. And lied. And lied. They made this an issue of fat, instead of the issue of a growing lie they told that resulted in the worst example of customer service since Fords Theater sold Lincoln a seat. The resulting feeling in the press: fuck fat people. We’re still allowed to make fun of them. And if you eat that many donuts, you’re bound to take a bunch of shit(s).

Fuck you, media, for not looking any deeper than the sound bite that’ll sell a falsehood. I’ve been here telling you the other side of the story for a few days, and you’d rather dress people up in fat suits and guess at my weight. I’m starting to feel like Jim Garrison: look at the crazy, fat nut, pointing out inconsistencies in an official story – that crackpot. But I’ll take “crackpot” over the human-weasels that say I did this for publicity. Sweet whistling Moses – only a thin person could ever think any fat person would want this much attention called to their size.

WGN Radio’s John Williams discusses the issue in Part 2 of his uncut podcast on his February 15h podcast. He’s got Kev’s side of it, too (though still seems unclear on that falsely spreading news that Kevin CAN fit just fine into their crummy narrow seats).

Saskatchewan artist Max Heron has created an editorial-style comic depicting the incident and taking it to the media for attacking the issue in such an unfair way.

In some cases though, the media have been very fair. Comedian/writer Cathy Ladman contibutes a very pro-Kevin editorial to CNN. Here’s a peek:

…Kevin Smith, I feel your pain!

I cringe for the person who has to sheepishly ask for the seat belt extender because the one in the narrow little seat doesn’t make it around his body. The world is not built for fat people, and airplanes are not the place to look for gentle treatment.

I will not be surprised when airlines start to weigh people’s luggage at the ticket counter, and then ask the traveler to get on the scale and be charged by the pound. It’s coming, you watch. Or they will have bench seats on the airplanes, measure people as they board, and seat them accordingly.

Synopsis

Bear Nation is an exploration of a sub-culture that exists within the gay rainbow. The documentary is presented in the format of show and tell. Through conversations with subjects, experts, bear-lebrites and admirers, the piece will attempt to shine a light on this fresh and vibrant movement.

Director Bio – Malcolm Ingram

A lifelong interest in film led Malcolm Ingram to work at The Toronto International Film Festival at the tender age of 21. After 3 booze soaked years of schmooze, Ingram left the organization to pursue a writing career with the influential Film Threat Magazine. While on assignment for the magazine, Ingram met Kevin Smith (Chasing Amy, Dogma, Clerks) who soon became his mentor and financed his first feature film. DRAWING FLIES, shot in Vancouver, BC in the summer of 1995, starred rising talent Jason Lee and had a successful run on the festival circuit.

Ingram’s next feature was TAIL LIGHTS FADE and featured a high profile and talented cast including Denise Richards, Jake Busey, Elizabeth Berkeley and Margot Kidder. With these two features under his belt, Ingram delved into his psyche and decided to make something more meaningful. Fortunately, it was at the same time that he realized he had a fondness for dudes.

SMALL TOWN GAY BAR was Ingram’s third film and it screened at over 50 film festivals internationally (Including a successful sold out screening at Inside Out). It was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at the Sundance Film festival and the GLAAD Media award for Best Documentary while winning THE HBO Award for Best Documentary in Miami and the Grand Jury Award at Outfest in Los Angeles.

Ingram recently finished his next gay opus BEAR NATION: LOOKING AT THE HISTORY AND IMPORTANCE OF FAT AND HAIR IN GAY – a documentary in seven parts.

Kevin and Malc’s Bear-themed SModcast should be available online sometime this weekend or early next week. Stay tuned.

With the film just 8 days away, you might wanna show your love for the film with some cool “Cop Out” swag. How about some for free? Gofobo has some pretty cool prizes up for grabs including hats, pins, gym bags, flashlights, and more. All you gotta do is fill out a form to enter. Good luck – Let’s see some News Askew fans win this stuff!

Had three seats/whole row for me & Jen. She skipped SF, so I went solo checked in and was given the 2 tix there & return 2 (for that p.m.).

Going out, even with 2 tix, I only sat in one seat, sleeping against window, w/empty seat between me and follow passenger. Coming back would have been the same, at 7pm. But I got to the airport early enough to try to bump-up my flight to 5:20 – a practice @SouthwestAir does often.

I was told 5:20 flight was packed, but I could go Standby. They sent me to gate. Told lady whole story, and she said there wouldn’t be two seats on that earlier flight. I said I only needed one seat & that I didn’t buy an extra seat because I’m fat (which I am), but because I’m anti-social and didn’t want to sit next to someone & possibly have to make convo (in person, I’m very shy). She said she understood. I was issued the solo ticket. I get on the plane: open seat in the front row. Put my bag away, the sit between two ladies. As I’m about to buckle my extender-less seatbelt, the woman who issued the ticket to me appeared in the doorway of the plane, came over to me and said the Captain said I wasn’t going to be allowed to sit there because I was a safety risk. I asked for clarification and was given none (also asked “Please don’t do this” but that, too, fell on deaf ears. Ladies on either side said I wasn’t a problem. SWA-lady said arm-rests the decider. Arm-rests come down, and voila! I’m legit! I’ve passed the stinkin’ arm-rest-test. And still, the lady asks me to get up and come with her off the plane. I get up without a fuss at all, quietly grab my bag, make eye contact with a fellow Fatty who was praying he’d pass, and leave. You think I wanna fuck around on an airplane? I was right: I fit in that seat. But I can’t risk not complying: I’m more afraid of AirFeds.

Reading all that, who the heck can blame Kevin for buying that extra seat just for a slight bit more privacy? We’d all love that. The issue here is, it seems that Southwest immediately translates any person buying two seats as someone who must be oversized. Really, really bad move there.

So let’s now get to the blog that Southwest issued as their public “apology”. Here’s a snippet:

The Captain did not single Kevin out to be removed, but he did ask that the boarding be completed quickly. At that time, our Employees made the decision to remove Kevin after a quick judgment call that he might have needed more than one seat for his comfort and those seated next to him.

Although I’m not here to debate the decision our Employees made, I can tell you that I for one have learned a lot today. The communication among our Employees was not as sharp as it should have been and, it’s apparent that Southwest could have handled this situation differently. Thanks, Kevin, for your passion around this topic. You were a reasonable guy during our conversation.

In this blog, they CONTINUE to claim that Kevin needed two seats. Keep in mind, on MANY MANY previous flights on this SAME airline, Kevin flew in a single seat, and was ALSO, prior to removal, comfortably belted into his seat on this flight, armest down.

Naturally, Kevin owed them another reply, and rather than clog twitter, posted his final words on this via the Silent Bob Speaks blog. Some snips:

“But the last paragraph is still all about your two seat rule. By including it, you guys are still saying I was Too Fat To Fly – or at least NOT correcting it. You even say ‘You’re not here to debate the decision the Employees made.’ But when we spoke, you told me they were wrong, and THAT’S why I was happy and ready to drop all this. I don’t want your money, I just want you to put in print what you told me: that I was grabbed because I was the last guy on, not because I didn’t fit with the arm rests down, or because I couldn’t buckle the seat belt. Because I did. And we both know this.”

I feel like a broken record with that stupid “But I could buckle and fit” shit. Pathetic, right? Grasping at any dignity straws. But that’s what you do when you’re kinda stripped of your dignity.

I could hear it in her voice: the sad frustration. Somewhere between the two phone calls, the bounty that was hinted at got a lot smaller. And while the apology is a little deeper now and more sincerely-worded than it was in the initial “apology” blog (thank you, Linda), it still infers that I need two seats to fly on Southwest Airlines.

…

You guys screwed up, SWA; why’s it so hard to own up to it? Now I’m gonna carry this Too Fat To Fly shit around like herpes for the rest of my life, and it was never even true.

So, Linda: I appreciate the effort you made, the time you spent with me on the phone, and the work you put into this. You, too, were a reasonable cat during our conversation.

But wrapping up with a repeating of that 2 seat policy (the one THAT HAS NO BEARING ON MY CASE) is a reminder that you guys haven’t learned anything: you’re still blaming it on the Fatty. Still, you tried. Thank you for that, Linda – and for being human.

Southwest, I appreciate you refunding my airfare. But if you’re not gonna admit I wasn’t Too Fat To Fly, then I’ll cover it.

Coverage on the situation continued on the web yesterday, with both Perez Hilton and CNN issuing new stories and updates on the blogs. For now, we’re going to go radio silent on this one as well, to allow Kevin to get back to the business at hand. After all, he’s got a new movie in theaters in a week and a half. Speaking of which…

Backstage.com has an interview with Guillermo Diaz, who plays the main villain in the film. In this piece he discusses movies vs. TV (he played a memorable character recently on Showtime’s “Weeds” and currently plays a much less menacing role on NBC’s “Mercy”), and drops quite a few tidbits about working on “Cop Out”. Here’s a snip:

For his most recent film role in “Cop Out,” Diaz had to audition for Smith. “It was just another audition,” he says. “I was in the middle of doing ‘Mercy,’ and my manager called and sent me the script. I went in and auditioned for the casting director, and she liked me and brought me in to meet Kevin Smith. It was a really quick process. I auditioned for him once, and then a week later we got the call that he wanted me for the role, and we started shooting right away. It was a really fast process. But it was great, an amazing experience, working with Kevin Smith, who is such a brilliant director. He is so smart, so witty, and so excited about his movies. Just working with him—wow, I feel really lucky that I got to work with Kevin Smith.”

If you prefer to listen your “Cop Out” press rather than read it, a 4-part roundtable (pieces of which you might have read or heard previously), enjoy these four links which take you to YouTube, but it’s all audio with stills peppered in. Lots of great stuff in this roundtable, including stuff on working with Bruce and Tracy, and Kevin’s thoughts on the trailer and marketing of the film. Overall, around 30 minutes of interview here.

“Cop Out” Roundtable Audio – Part 1
“Cop Out” Roundtable Audio – Part 2
“Cop Out” Roundtable Audio – Part 3
“Cop Out” Roundtable Audio – Part 4

And finally, here’s one for the REAL fans — The IMDB reports that the great Ernie O’Donnell, childhood friend of Kevin’s and famous for his small roles in “Clerks”, “Chasing Amy”, “J&SBSB” and “Jersey Girl”, plays the role of a “Masked Man” in “Cop Out”. Way cool.