By : Ryan Landau

DOGMA

Cast: Ben Affleck, George Carlin, Matt Damon, Linda Fiorentino, Salma Hayek, Jason Lee, Jay Mewes, Alan Rickman, Chris Rock and Kevin Smith (Phew!)
Rated R
Runtime: 2 hours, 10 minutes
Director: Kevin Smith

I have a history of sorts with this film, which initially made it very difficult to review it. You see, I first learned about Dogma, the new comedy from Kevin Smith (the writer/director of Clerks and Chasing Amy), some thirteen months ago, after reading about it in a magazine. I easily found a copy of the screenplay and read all 200 pages in about two hours. That's how good it was. However, little did I know I would have to wait over a year to see Dogma, which, upon completion, was marred by several protests from Catholic groups as well as a change in studio, causing sufficient stir to probably postpone the film's projected release several times. NOTE: The plot of Dogma is deeply rooted in the beliefs of Catholicism and in no way directly reflects the beliefs or ideals of this critic (even though he is a Christian). Now keep reading, or I'll get fired. Dogma is the story of.well, several things. Bartleby and Loki (Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, respectively) are angels. Or, rather they were angels; "fallen angels" is now their proper title. You see, over two thousand years ago, when God was a vengeful, wrathful God, He had an Angel of Death employed. Loki was this Angel of Death, and darn good at what he did. Then, one day, after he had finished causing the 10th Plague (where all the first born in Egypt were killed), Loki went out for a post-slaughter drink with his friend Bartleby, a guardian angel of sorts. They got drunk, and Bartleby convinced Loki that killing-even in the name of God-is wrong.

Loki, now thoroughly sloshed, went to see God, told Him he quit, and gave Him the finger. Naturally, God didn't take this well, and, as punishment, exiled Bartleby and Loki to Earth for the rest of human existence, doomed to languish in a place more horrible than Hell-Wisconsin.

So now, in the present day, the two fallen ones remain in cheese country, until they find their ticket home-a loophole in Catholic law (called Catholic dogma). When a Catholic Church turns 100 years old, a special event occurs where anyone who walks through the church doors is immediately absolved of all sin.

So, Bartleby gets the idea for him and his fellow seraph to go to this church and walk through the doors, becoming forgiven of their trespass against God. Then, they'll cut their wings off to become human, and die, thus sending them back to Heaven.

Sounds all (well, somewhat) cut and dry, right? Well, there's a rather large catch, one Bartleby and Loki don't know about: if they get back to heaven without God's permission, it proves God wrong, and the entire Universe hinges on the fact that God is infallible.

If Bartleby and Loki make it back to Heaven, God will be found wrong, the Universe will be "un-made", and existence will be...gone.

So Metatron, the angel who acts as the Voice of God (Alan Rickman, whom I'm certain none of you have ever heard of, but was in Die Hard), necessary because God's true voice crushes men's skulls and makes their hearts explode, taps Bethany, an abortion clinic worker working in Illinois, to stop the two renegade angels, based on "who she is," as Metatron puts it. One thing leads to another, and she ends up travelling across the northeastern United States to the church, which is in New Jersey, aided by a pair of "prophets"--Jay and Silent Bob from Smith's other movies (played by Jason Mewes and Smith, respectively)--and the long lost 13th black apostle, Rufus (Chris Rock), who literally fell out of the sky to help Bethany.

What follows is a bizarre road trip that is sometimes exciting, sometimes just plain freaky (our heroes must contend with malicious hockey stick-wielding demon children and a walking mass of...well, poop), but almost always funny as hell. And the whole things ends with a bang, as the angels...well, I'm not gonna spoil it for you. All I say is that it's big enough that God shows up.

As I said initially, I've been waiting for this movie for over a year. So was it worth the wait? Absolutely. Was it up to my expectations? Well, actually...no, it wasn't. But don't get me wrong, Dogma is a great movie. Well, that which is on screen is mostly great at least. The biggest problem I had with the movie was its length.

No, it wasn't too long; it's too short. The original cut (which correlates with the script I read) was about three hours long. The movie now runs at a little over two hours. Fifty minutes are gone, and, knowing what was removed, I can safely say that the movie could've only improved from the extra material. Very little of it is filler; alot of what was removed is background info on some characters (in particular, some funny bits about Rufus, and a vision of Hell).

In addition--and this was not a problem for me, but it may be on for other people--Dogma is a very busy film. Like Mystery, Alaska (which you may remember I deemed sub-par), Dogma has a massive ensemble cast, and the casual viewer may get lost in the bustle.

Loki, Bartleby and Bethany are the main characters, but you've also got Rufus, Jay, Silent Bob, Metatron, not to mention the characters that I didn't talk about, including the demon Azrael (Chasing Amy's Jason Lee), and Serendipity (Salma Hayek displaying beauty and brains), a former heavenly muse who got tired of inspiring other people's successes and went into the world to make her own name, only to get writer's block.

This is offset by that fact that almost every principal actor gives an excellent performance. Affeck and Rock easily give their best performances to date, and Mewes, the only actor in the film who isn't really a professional actor, is a pleasant surprise. Rickman plays the Metatron with the sardonic wit that was absolutely necessary for the character (and he gives some of the film's best lines of dialogue to boot). Hayek, like I said, makes her character smart but sexy at the same time. Jason Lee....I can't comment on his Azrael. Fiorentino is great as Bethany, forced into this situation without really being able to make a choice. She gives Bethany the almost lazy edginess that makes her an exceptional actress.

And the script...well, the script's really the best part of Dogma. Kevin Smith's work here--even in its cut form--further cements my opinion that he is one of the best screenwriters of the last ten years.

Dogma's script is consistently hilarious (with most of the best jokes going to Mewes, Rock and Rickman), all the while not letting itself get so silly as to let the audience forget the universe is supposed to be at stake. And yes, I will now tell you that Azrael IS the villain, but his motive isn't the typical, "I'm gonna destroy the cosmos for the hell of it!" kind of motive; you actually almost feel sorry for him.

However, Dogma is not without a few minor problems. For all its excellence, the script occaisonally stalls, mainly due to two or three scenes full of exposition about religion, angels, or Catholicism.

But I can understand that most of this is necessary, otherwise, some people may get completely lost. The larger tiny complaint is the look of the film.

Althought this doesn't really detract from the overall viewing experience, the film does boast a decidedly amatuerish look to it. Kevin Smith may be a fantastic writer...but he really needs to practice his directing skills. A film like this deserves a better visual dynamic.

Ever since its completion over a year ago, Dogma has been a frequent of protest, mainly from Catholic groups (and extremists) who haven't even seen the movie, or know what it's about. However, having seen it (and being a rational man, I hope) I can safely say that I cannot imagine a rational person being personally offended by this because of the religious aspects.

Even when it's as controverisal as it gets--a subplot involving the Catholic church revamping its image in order to become more pop-culture friendly--I don't believe that Smith intended to attack or riducule any one person or group of people. He's merely saying how he feels about certain things--about God, and faith, and even chruch. And don't pass up and oppurtinity to see this movie because you're not a Christian or a Catholic--it's still good entertainment value, because at it's heart, Dogma is a fairy tale about the battle between Good and Evil, albeit with a few twists. And for Christians, despite all the cursing (and yes, there is cursing) and the violence (and yes, there is violence), there is a final message to Dogma; even if you're not necessarily a Catholic, the message is still valid. But I think it's different for different people.

I saw the message as being that God loves us, and just because sometimes we face hardships or misfortunes in life doesn't mean He (or She, as the movie half-contends) doesn't stop loving us. At least, that's what I got out of it.

Which brings me to my biggest point about Dogma: no matter what someone else tells you about the film, or how "offensive" it is, or how "evil" it is, you must find out for yourself, to make your own judement. In other words go see it. A-

© Big Blue Review, 1999